lost somewhere between heaven and earth
Ah yes, a truly inspiring day when I put in two log entries. . .see previous entry for the reason why.
a) I wonder, as I get older, why I can never really recapture the intensity of my teenage years. It seems like that time in your life is so passionate--probably in good part because it is a time of a lot of firsts, first kiss, first drink, first really meaningful semi-adult friendship, etc. etc. I don't really look back with nostalgia because being a teenager's pretty damn hard, and I'm happy right now. But I was thinking this evening that maybe part of that passionate emotion, part of what's lonely and exhilariting about being lost somewhere between childhood and adulthood is precisely that quality of being lost. When you're lost there is glory in the looking, you seek yourself, what's important to you, your path. There are a lot of failures, some successes, but your passion comes from the search. As you get older, or at least as I've gotten older, life is less about looking and more about recognizing what I need to do and motivating myself to do it. I may not be able to see my future, but I have a strong sense of my path. I don't feel lost anymore, and I think there's a painful kind of beauty in being lost.
b) okay, was just reading that according to the Essene book of Moses (ie first five books of the pentateuch), found in the dead sea scrolls, the commandment to honor your mother and father is actually the commandment to honor your mother earth and father heaven. interesting no? Could be an argument for environmentalism, but that's another tangent. What I find particularly interesting about this heaven and earth vocubalary its its central place in so many philosophies. It occurs again and again in the New Testament Gospels, is prominent in the the I Ching and Tao Te Ching. I don't know about buddhist texts, or hindu ones, but I'd be willing to guess that H + E make an appearance at least in the former. So why this importance? Well, other than as an expression of a central binary principal governing the existence of mankind (wow, lofty statement), heaven and earth are our means to orient ourselves. According to the I ching there is a number system, one is unity (the Tao, Taiji--meaning supreme ultimate--god, etc. etc.), two is yin-yang (binaries prevalent throughout any religious system, masculine/feminine principles, good/evil, dark/light, heaven/earth), and three is heaven, earth and human. Our place is between them. Our feet are rooted on the ground and our spines reach to heaven. We are in both places at once. Awareness of heaven and earth, of the land around us and the sky above, are basic preconditions to self-awareness, both in the literal and the metaphorical (ie awareness of our environment in the literal sense and a sense of opposing universal forces and how they affect our lives in the abstract sense). Now, the problem is when we stop being aware of these things, and start trying to govern them, analyse them, or worse, conquer them. Heaven and Earth can govern themselves, and no matter how hard we try, we'll never really understand completely the world around us--that's part of the beautiful mystery of life--so how could we possibly conquer them? The truth is, we've forgotten that it is our place to stand on the earth and look to the heavens. Instead we're trying to carve away at them both, thinking it's the only way we can find a place for ourselves. So next time you're out under the sky, stand up and feel the ground rooting your feet, lift your spine up to the sky and honor mother earth and father heaven.